Where do I even begin?

Oh my gosh, it’s been forever since I’ve said anything here, let’s see if I can catch you up.

Our Twinsies are 15 months old!!!!! Can you believe it? They run, tackle each other, LOVE clothes, are OBSESSED with shoes, climb ridiculously high, say several words, recognize the letter E (I don’t know, it just happened), Selah has curly hair and Noah’s is straight, Selah will eat any carb you put in front of her while Noah craves meat, Selah loves to sing, Noah loves to dance, Selah is fearless, Noah is calculated, Selah likes to take in the whole scene at once, Noah likes to analyze everything bit by bit, Selah runs to me when she is upset, Noah runs away. They both love the outdoors, they both love spicy Thai food, they both love the movie Tangled and for both of them, their favorite person in the whole wide world is their Brubby T. Quaid.

Tae started talking!!!! One day he just started rattling off full sentence like “How are you?” and “Daddy, where are you?”. The other night he was in bed and would rather have been up. He stood in his room crying and yelling “Mama, where are you? Mama, I love you.” The talking is a double-edged sword. He’s also become very protective of his sisters, while also having an affinity to beat the tar out of them. He’s really a stellar older brother.

The children and I spent the majority of the month of July in the Homeland. A week at the cabin in Ely on the lake and the rest of the time feverishly visiting friends and family. It was so lovely. The children saw bears, Tae took a long boat ride and also got to sit and play in the cockpit of a seaplane, we played for hours at a time in the lake, we went to the Isanti County Fair where the kids got to see all kinds of farm animals and watch the horse project drill team perform their state winning routine. We went twice to the Northshore where we climbed rocks and played in the cool pools left by the waves of Lake Superior and had earlier gone to the Zoo and the children saw the boats in the harbor from Canal Park. By this time Jesse had joined us and we had a wonderful last weekend in Minnesota as a family. Jesse and I also got to sample some local fare in Surly and Summit Brewing companies along with Fitgers and take a trip to the homebrewers Mecca that is Midwest Brewing Supplies.

What else…Jesse is back in school and I’ll return for the Spring Semester which will bring some change to our lives, which is awesome and exciting…That’s all I can think of for now, we’re busy and we’re glad Summer is over.

Nope, he’s their Dad

Every now and then, say three or four times a month, I get to go out by myself. I read, write and drink some delicious Roasterie concoction and enjoy the sounds of a place where grown ups hang out and if there’s a child screaming somewhere, I smile a little just knowing it’s not mine.

Generally speaking, I’ll run into a friend or acquaintance and without fail they’ll ask me if Mister is “babysitting”.

Aside from the rage I feel at society on the whole when being asked if my husband is babysitting his own children, I’m also heartbroken that people really think that fathering can be equated with such a thing. Jesse isn’t a babysitter. He’s their father, he loves them more than anything in the entire world and parents them beautifully whether I’m their or not.

All of these things run through my head at once upon the question being asked, but my stock answer has become “Nope, he’s their dad.”, which usually results in confusion, but I’m ok with it.

For one week now the children and I have been away from our wonderful Da-EE and we have one more week to go. Mister, you’re the best and the babes and I can’t wait until you’re with us again.

The Untouchables: A Vaccine Manufacturers Tale

Have you ever heard of “vaccine court”? I had heard the term used before but was unaware of what it fully meant until recently.

Vaccine court is where you go after filing a lawsuit based on the claim that yourself or your child has been harmed by a vaccination. However, the guy sitting in the defendants chair is not Merck or Pfizer, it’s the federal government.

Vaccine court was created to protect the manufacturers of vaccines in the event of a shot doing harm. The thought behind the creation is simple. In the event a vaccine does inflict injury if the manufacturer is held accountable it will eventually bankrupt the company and endanger the health of the entire nation, therefore, the vaccine maker cannot be sued, but the federal government can.

That means that when it is found that a vaccine did do harm, you and I pay for it. The only publicized settlement to date was to a little girl for 1.5 million and then 500k a year, every year for 20 years. Poor sweet thing went from happy, healthy 18 month old to autistic in a day after receiving 9 vaxes at once. Yeah, I said autistic. The government maintains that the side effect is an indeterminate brain injury, but the children named in these settlements are all treated for autism. Interesting.

That, however, is hardly the point. Vaccine manufacturers have zero accountability. Zero. Yet, we trust them implicitly. I see a problem here.

Vaccines and Blinding Rage

Last night Jesse and I were hanging out, watching Castle after we got the babes to bed. As we watched there was a commercial for a local news station special report.

The ad started with foreboding music and white letters on a black background that read, over three screens, “parents” “making their children sick” “on purpose”. In the split second before they told us what they were reporting on, I thought it odd to do an entire expose’ on Munchhausen’s but, whatever I guess. However, as the commercial rolled on my confusion was replaced by white, blinding rage.

The actual next sentence started with “Chicken pox….” after which I almost heard nothing but the sound of my own blood pounding in my ears. Really? REALLY?!?!?!?!?

The short ad went on to interview a mom who said she’d rather have her babe get chicken pox than the vaccine, but the crown jewel of my own personal rage-fest was the doctor they interviewed that was only showed saying “Before the vaccine many children were dying from chicken pox.”

Many? Really? MANY? Most everyone I know had the chicken pox. All made it through unscathed.

There was however, one exception. I had a friend who didn’t get the pox, but when we were 17 he got shingles for which he ended up in a medical journal because he almost died. The doctor told all of us that if he had had the pox when he was young, this would not have happened.

Also, with pox in particular, they really don’t know how long it lasts which increases the likelihood for shingles which recurs every time you are exposed to the virus. So, which one would you pick? Chicken pox for your small babe and be done forever or the more serious version (shingles) for an undetermined number of times as an adult? I’ll take the pox. *end propaganda induced rage*. (Oh yeah, I called it propaganda.)

The Diaper Rash from Hell

Recently, the Twinsies had a diaper rash. What I didn’t know was that it was some crazy mutant rash from another world which had set out to destroy the happiness of all things Wells.

I am unfamiliar with diaper rash, or was rather, now I’ve been in the trenches and emerged victorious but there were moments, moments in which I doubted deserving the title of mommy because mommy’s can cure rashes, quickly. I did not.

The Twinsies lived with the mutant for 6, count ‘em, 6 weeks. Why didn’t I take them to the doc you ask? Because the weirdest part about the whole thing was that it didn’t seem to bother them. They cried when when we changed them, but no more than normal, so I pressed on. I didn’t want them to have some crazy anti-everything cream from the doc, I wanted to find the most gentle, non-abrasive way to cure this beast. So, as a result, I tried everything, and when I say everything, I mean it. Garlic, breastmilk, Greek yogurt, ACV baths, ACV sprays, Mother Love diaper rash cream and then, in a moment of utter desperation, we tried desitin somewhere in the middle…which didn’t work either.

There came a point where I told myself I had 1 week and then it was doctor time and then, came my revelation. I work best under pressure. I realized that their skin seemed dry and chapped more than afflicted by yeast or bacteria so I thought back, all the way to when the little bastard showed up on sweet Nana’s bum and realized we had washed their diapers with new detergent. They’d had reaction and now their poor sweet irritated skin had been assaulted by desitin and vinegar and disposable diapers…geez.

So, I bathed them, using soap for sensies diapered them, threw in a clove of garlic, just in case and went to bed. The next morning they already looked better. Garlic disposed of and rediapered with Mother’s Love just in case they were free. Then another bath that night, repeated for 5 days and voila! We beat the bastard. I’m still not entirely sure what exactly it was, I just know it’s gone now, praise the Lamb.

Ten Months of Twinsies

April 2nd marked one year since “baby b” was discovered. What a day that was. People always ask me how I reacted thinking it would be some epic freak out, but I always disappoint. I just sat there and thought “Yeah, this is something that would happen to us.” And moved on to our new reality.

Today the girls are ten months. They walk, they talk, they share, they love and they are insanely adorable. We love them with all our hearts. I can’t wait to see what tomorrow brings for them.

Away They Go

9 Months and Walking

The moment I knew he was smarter than me

One of my all time favorite moments with T. Quaid was also one of the most horrifying. It was a moment that made me laugh so hard I cried and once I started crying I shed a few tears because my 18 month old had beaten me. It was bittersweet but mostly it was wicked awesome.

It was lunch time which for T. Quaid happens post nap. He was in his high chair which he had negotiated to be moved to the edge of the kitchen so he could watch his post nap movie. I decided it was fair, especially since Lala needed to be nursed and the movie would buy me some extra time without TQ scurrying about.

In terms of sign language, I started TQ really late and the only reason I did it was because he didn’t talk, he still doesn’t talk. The only thing I really wanted to know was when he was done eating so over the course of a couple of weeks he learned the signs for both ‘more’ and ‘all done’. It was easy enough.

So on this particular day I settled in on the couch beneath Ms. Lala while Nana chillaxed in the boppy next to me. Selah ate and then promptly fell asleep. TQ was eating some penne with pesto and guzzling apple juice happily until he was dissatisfied with my masterful arrangement.

I heard him saying something that I dismissed as toddler gibberish and continued to hold Selah and talk to Noah until I felt something hit my head. It was penne, and it was everywhere.

Me: Taegan! Stop buddy, stop!

Taegan looked at me and continued with what I had earlier dismissed as gibberish and plain as day signed and said ‘more’ and then chucked another piece of pasta at my face. I was laughing so hard I could hardly breathe as TQ continued his tirade, alternating ‘more’ and ‘all done’ as he strewn his noodles through out the kitchen and living room.

I was stuck, and he knew it. I had both a sleeping infant and a happy infant and a little pasta on the floor wasn’t worth disturbing the equilibrium. I just sat back and enjoyed my son’s victory.

He was exercising his right to protest and his demonstration while it remained peaceful, was very effective.

Productivity

Being productive for a stay at home mom could mean almost anything. Beating a diaper rash (Noah’s still plagues us, but a combination of garlic, Greek yogurt and breastmilk are gaining us some ground), making dinner, changing diapers, brushing my teeth, doing the laundry, cleaning…cleaning anything really, going for a walk, supervising TQ paint, avoiding civil war, making baby food, folding clothes (you might think that folding clothes is included in doing laundry, but with 3 children the two have been separated entirely), sweeping, the list is as endless as can be. Productivity recently means two things to me. The first is a garden, the second is cupcakes.

First of all, something that you’re all interested in. The Babes. The Babes are awesome. T. Quaid has decided that he is more OK with using real words, some times, and has taken an official interest in the potty. He has been interested before, but this time it seems to be lasting. Please Jesus, let him be potty trained soon…ish.

The Twinsies are pretty much the coolest duo ever. And when I say ever I am asserting their awesomeness above the likes of Martin and Lewis, Abbott and Costello, Elmo and Mr. Noodle, Barbie and Ken, Woody and Buzz and many other duos previously thought to be the best. Nay, I say, nay. The Twinsies out-awesome all of those poor fools. They are 9 months now. Let me say that again. Nine months. Old. 3/4 of a year…meaning almost a year…yet it was not even a year ago that we knew there were two of them. Chew on that for a while. They eat a lot. I make baby food probably twice a week at this point. I’m so grateful for the time to do it, we would be spending their college tuition on feeding them otherwise. They are also on the cusp of walking. They can take up to 6 steps unassisted this week, last week that number was 2 or 3. Watching them together is amazing. They have a partner to discover/conquer the world with. And they have Brubby…he is on their side 100%…except when he is pushing them over…but he does it because he wants them to chase him…admittedly, we may have played to rough with him for him to understand proper social behavior. Oops. Parenting is like law or medicine, it’s a practice. Anyway, all that to say, aside from their waking still 2-5 times a night (big span, huh?), they are amazing and enhance our lives in every way.

OK, onto the new ventures in productivity. This year we are planting a vegetable and herb garden. We spend a small fortune on produce and I don’t want to do that any more. I want to grow food! Good food. Food that didn’t come from GMOs or was harvested by Mexican children. I want my children to learn about sustainable living. I want them to learn how to compost and plant and harvest and cook real food, real good food that has nutrients that they need. First, I have to not suck at this. I’m nervous. But, we trudge onward. This past weekend we built an 8×4 bed and I tilled about 2/3 of the soil. My dear friend Charity is my forerunner, she did a garden last year and I am gleaning information from her as we go. We’re pretty excited.

The next venture is cupcakes. We’re kind of on opposite ends of the spectrum here. Fresh produce to white flour, but bear with me. My friend Lauren has been talking about doing a cupcake business for a while but she has been super busy this past year with things like school and getting married so now that the dust of her life has settled, together we had a great idea. Not just cupcakes, boozy cupcakes. Yep. Cupcakes, filled with alcohol. We’ve made two recipes so far and they’re both awesome. Also both were stolen, but we tweaked them enough to call them our own. We bake Wednesdays and Saturdays and have also joined a gym. We feel like we are at the beginning of something that could be cool.

Alright, *sigh* I never know how to end these…

Diaper Rash and Other Drugs

T. Quaid hardly ever had a diaper rash, I’m talking almost never…his bum got a bit red maybe 3 times so far in his just over 2 years. This has not been the case with the ladies. Even worse, occasionally it’s a yeast rash. As I’ve said before I put breast milk on it, but this time, for our lovely Ms. Noah, that didn’t work. The next morning it was the angriest looking rash I’d ever seen on our children.

So to the google. I know friends who have used garlic cure their yeast infections but was unsure about what to do with my babe.

As I read about garlic’s properties and general awesomeness I decided to forgo the mixtures and pastes that included other ingredients and simply decided to go to the pantry, pop off a clove, give it a little beating with my knife and simply toss it in her diaper. It worked like gangbusters. This morning her rash is nearly completely gone. It is no longer an angry red but a faint pink. I would guess that by tomorrow morning it will be but a memory.

New subject, a friend asked me a while ago how to get their babe to drink out of cups and at the time, I said that I had nothing to offer because The Twinsies love stealing their Brubby’s cups, but then my husband reminded me of the trial that it was to get T. Quaid to drink out of a cup. Jen, this one’s for you.

He refused, there was nothing we could do to convince him that cups were awesome. Until we found this.  After we started using it, our life got simpler.  He only used it for a couple of weeks before he went to a cup with a little harder top.  The familiarity of the top helped him get the concept.

In other news, The Twinsies have been upgraded from “crawling” to CRAWLING, you know what I’m talking about.  They also can stand up anywhere, no furniture or wall needed and each have taken as many as three unassisted steps.  T. Quaid now sees their value.

Alright, that’s all for now keep on keepin’ on.